In My Defense

Okay...in my defense let me say:
that I am a person who likes to write,
who enjoys a talent that God bestowed
for me to communicate both good and bad,
fact and fiction both happy and sad.


Okay, in my defense let me say:
that God uses bad situations brought on by the devil,
to turn it into something good, so others will see His glory.
I believe I can help others, called to serve others, 
give others a voice to reveal their feelings, 
as an aid to healing and moving on...


(Helping others is my moving on.
I promise to do it more carefully from now on.)


Okay, 
because my words and feelings are too honest,
too personal, too controversial to some I know, 
I WILL EDIT MY FEELINGS & HOLD MY TONGUE.


I will find that journal as a gift I once received,
and/or I will confess in prayers that only HE hears and sees.
I will go where I'm unknown and thus greater support abounds,
for I want to be a helper, but like Jesus, not on familiar grounds.


Because I love you and other close relationships,
since I respect you and you respect me, too,
I will keep my voice silent
and assume forgiveness is a reality.


The bottom line is I love you and will grant your wishes.

Mothering My Inner Child

If I were to get in touch with my 'inner child,' at what age would I befriend myself? I think I would step in the day I graduated from kindergarten. I'm looking forward to exploring myself and the way I might have turned out. I'm looking forward to mothering myself.

I am a Tree

I

am

a tree,

growing

bigger

every day.

Each new day

the seasons unfold:

morning is Spring,

afternoon is Summer,
night is Fall. Looming midnight Winter.

In the Spring,
I sprout new growth that is vibrant green.

In the Summer,
I thrive and the fruits of my boughs now form.

In the Fall, my autumn, I rest while leaves brown and fade.

In the Winter, I curl up and die, hibernate, then reborn in Spring, thus beginning my cycle once more.

I am a tree growing despite lack of water…

Wonderful Years Loving Abby

ABBY KENNARD – June 1994 – December 27, 2008
Prayer for Abby, Our Loyal Pet–14 ½ Years Old

Heavenly God, Creator of all things,
Thank you for giving us Abby, our loyal pet.
Thank You for letting Abby teach us about love.
Thank You for the wonderful memories
that we will remember to brighten our days.

We loved Abby’s shiny, soft, black hair with a bit of white.
We loved how she laid right in front of the refrigerator.
We loved how she came to the table and begged for food.
We loved giving her bacon and eggs snacks and leftovers.
We loved hearing Abby sing to the harmonica.
We loved taking Abby for walks in the doggy-park and woods.
Ray loved how Abby heard the sound of the truck tailgate go up then raced to the truck door to help make a firewood delivery. Ray loved taking Abby to McDonalds after a delivery.
We loved Abby’s kisses, howl, wet nose, and brown eyes.
We loved everything about Abby!

We loved Abby, and now we send her home to You, God.
Abby will keep You and Jesus company in heaven,
And we know that Abby is now happy to visit with:
Rosie the cat and Lady the dog,
Grammy & Grampa Kennard,
Grammy & Grampa Pearson,
Mom & Dad Kennard,
Grammy & Grampa B.,
Nana F., and all our other loved ones in heaven.
We know You love Abby, too, God,
because GOD spelled backwards is DOG.
Abby was our best friend. Now she can be Yours.
Thank You for giving us so many wonderful years loving Abby.

Amen.

Dabbling in Ho, Ho, Ho

YEARLY, 
I STRIVE TO REMEMBER 
THAT JESUS IS THE REASON FOR THE SEASON! 
CHRISTIANS SING PRAISES FOR THE NEWBORN KING;
WHILE MALLS ARE PACKED WITH SHOPPERS 
PUSHING AND SHOVING TO GRAB THE GIFTS 
THEY BELIEVE WILL MAKE THEIR LOVED ONES HAPPY.
ONE YEAR I PLAYED SANTA AT THE HAIR STUDIO
SO CHILDREN COULD COME AND 
'HELP SANTA GET HIS HAIR CUT.'
HERE I AM HOLDING MY GREAT NIECE AND NEPHEW.
STILL I REMEMBER THAT 
JESUS IS THE REASON FOR THE SEASON,
BUT ON RARE OCCASION I DABBLE IN 
HO, HO, HO!

Religion As I Feel It

More and more I've felt drawn closer to my religion. I grew up attending Sunday school throughout my thirteen years of formal schooling. I learned bible stories, endless names of who begot whom, about the twelve disciples, and most importantly, the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit.

I took religion as seriously back then as "all my Sunday school friends got baptized, so I did, too. It made me feel special." 
In my young adult life, I went into the world to see what if offered, or what I could give. I admit, I made some tactless mistakes...some forever regrettable. However, forgivable by Him, if I forgive others.

I met my husband at church sixteen years ago. We got married fifteen years ago. Since the day I met my husband, my belief and faith in God and Jesus skyrocketed. I now pray daily, ask for what I need, and offer myself to fulfill His will. I am surprised daily at how He talks to me and opens my eyes.

I don't like to push my religion on folks, so I won't. 
If you truly know God, I shouldn't have to push.
(Photo by Nella Masil Easter 2009)

Purple Lilac Dreams

Fond memories of the lilac scent floating in the checkerboard screen on a mid-summer's night...with a slight breeze and stars twinkling above.

Laying awake in my darkened childhood bedroom, I waited on a life waiting to be lived, dreaming that after prom and proposals came marriage.

Across bare breasts a warm, muggy breeze floating in the checkerboard screen on a mid-summer's night, the stars twinkling above...with the only good thing coming from the outside lilac trees.

Three decades later the intricate purple buds blossom, and take me back to the day when a life waiting to be lived seemed unattainable...but now is a grand fantasy. 

(Photo by Nella Masil)

Windchimes and Bumble Bees

Planting flowers in the breeze, among wind chimes and bumble bees,
we gather with flowers and pots, enjoying what is...forgiving what's not.

Dressed in colors bright and cheery, we gather to laugh, talk, and smile, 
skipping over lines-in-the-sand, now drawn for a while.

Come, visit my home, meander around, in my yard you can roam,
Open our hearts, bask in the love, and for time that heals, let's thank God above.

Planting flowers in the breeze, among wind chimes and bumble bees,

we gather with flowers and pots, enjoying what is...forgiving what's not.

I'm the Aunt Who'll Let You Go Away

I am the aunt who set up the kiddie pool,
I am the aunt who swam tho' the water was cool.

I am the aunt who encourages your creative blog,
I am the aunt who shines in sunlight, rain, and fog.

I am the aunt who takes you to neat-o fun places,
I am the aunt who makes strange noises and funny faces.

I am the aunt who loves you forever and ever,
I am the aunt who never says never, no never.

I am the aunt who gardens, crafts, and sews,

I am the aunt who lets you step on my toes.

I am the aunt who gives you a room in my home,

I am the aunt who never lets you feel alone.

I am the aunt teaching you about God's love,

I am the aunt teaching you about heaven above.

I am the aunt who is your Godmother,

I am the aunt who is your second-mother.

I am the aunt who lets you visit and stay,

I am the aunt who knows one day you'll go away.

Echoes in my Childhood Church

This is my church.

This is the view I dreamed in when I was a child learning about God.

These colored windows

let in the warm sun, and blocked out the devil!

In this church, when I was young,

I prayed, I sang, and I pondered.

Now, forty years later, I've gone back for a visit.

Back to the colored windows.

Echos of my childish voice still singing, still praying, still reverberating off these hallowed walls.

This is my church.

This is my salvation!

Religious Manners

Here is a lesson in religious manners:
To those of my readers who appreciate God and all he does in your life, join me in saying,
"THANK YOU!"

To those of my readers who don't know God, or who have drifted apart from the Lord, I encourage you to renew your friendship.

God wants to be your best friend!
God wants to be your cheerleader!
God wants to stand beside you!

Just say,
"YES, PLEASE!"

(Photo by Unknown)

Five Little Girls

Five little girls sitting in a circle,
celebrating their little friend's birthday.
Five little girls under the age of ten,
seeing the world through angelic eyes.

Five little girls depart from their circle,
going down different paths in life,
Five little girls grow into teenagers,
seeing the future through rose-colored glasses.

Five little girls become five old ladies,
their paths crossing every now and then.
Five old ladies gathered in a circle,
their past lives they can only daydream about.

...teetering on the brink...

...sometimes this world with all its complexities...
... is like a boulder teetering on a rock...
...i try to hold up my end of the boulder...
...different responsibilities...
...different personalities...
...different wishes or dreams...
...yet it is always the same...
...at the end of the day...
...i ponder my life...
...and teeter on the brink of wonder...
...what if i had chosen differently...
...what if i didn't return to this life...
...would i be single and sad, still...
...would i be his, or his, or his wife...
...only god knows the outcome for me...
...no, i never want a peek to see...
...i want to live like it's my last day on earth...
...and share a smile, a laugh, a touch...
...and be content with the final outcome...

JOHN 14:6

'NOUGH SAID!

A Prayer for You

Dear One,

The sun is shining on this new day...the first day of fall.

***

Last night I concluded my first bible study on the Book of Esther.

As the title stated..."It's Tough Being a Woman."

During my nine weeks of study I made several new women friends and glad to have met them.

***

Fear not! With God at your side,

he promises and delivers to you strength, hope, love, comfort, cheerfulness, compassion, praise, and the promise of fulfilling your destiny...if you believe and challenge yourself to recognize your purpose in this life, placed here in this world at 'such a time as this'; you may then fully enjoy your God-given life and make the most of it. If you can be of service and help others along the way, more is the glory to God.

***

I am still working on figuring out my personal destiny, but ultimately, loving and trusting God and believing in Jesus' sacrifice is the first destiny I've fulfilled. We must accept and believe in the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. Live it, breathe it, and spread the word. I'd sure like to see you along side me one day in heaven!

***

With that said, I now pray that God blesses you and keeps you safe!

Amen

God: A Light That Shines so Bright

(Photo by Nella Masil - A view of the heart of my childhood church)
At the advice of my new Bible Study Sisters, I now offer my second written prayer:
My Dear Wonderful God,

This morning when I woke up with a headache, I immediately ran to take a pill.
I lay back down and let Your sun (Son) shine on my face for the real medicine.

With my pillow wet from pent-up tears,
I confessed for the umpteenth time my past wrongs,
chided myself for the last time,
and allowed You to let me forgive myself.

From now on, I will leave the past in the past.
I will look forward to the future You are giving me
with a smile on my face and You securely in my heart.
The devil may try to bring me down with hurts,
but the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit
far out-weight any oppression he may attempt to sneak in.

Thank you God, for all the love You have allowed in my life.
Thank you God, for helping me to rise above pettiness.
Thank you God, for placing me in this life 'at such a time as this'!
Thank you God, for the family and friends You have gifted me with.

May I be a good example of a Christian to those You put in my path.
May you comfort us lovingly,
protect us from evil always,
and be a Light that shines so bright there is no Darkness in our lives.

In Jesus name I humbly pray,
Amen.

Nightly Prayer

Now I lay me down to sleep...

 

but before I do,

I pray You will keep me in Your care.

That while I sleep

I'm not plagued by those repeated dreams

that after 16 years have become

bothersome nightmares.

 

I know You are with me daily, Lord,

walking beside me,

standing behind me,

holding my hand, and

carrying me when the road is rocky.

 

Keep me in Your care, Lord,

for my aches and pains

are many,

yea, my joys are many more!

 

Help me not to forget

that kind words cost nothing

and mean everything!

Encourage me to share them

more often.

 

If I should die before I wake...

I pray the Lord my soul to take!

To Be Sure: Walk the Walk

When I was talking to friend whose sister was dying of cancer, he got choked-up and is struggling with her prognosis...I tried to be of encouragement, but when it comes right down to it, in the end, it is between YOU AND GOD!

I hope you all will be present in heaven with me one day...to be sure, think of it this way: you can talk the talk, but unless you walk the walk, you have no guarantee. A minister placating you and suggesting you'll go to heaven without truly believing and living the Christian life, is only making you feel good, falsely.

You must understand and accept that you are living in the Kingdom of God right now, and act like it, and know that Jesus is your Lord and Savior. Without the deep conviction, it is all just 'lip service.'

I know my friend's sister and husband are very religious. I believe it is their faith that has given them their only hope of something better following this courageous battle. Death is only part of the journey...eternal life is a believers reward!

If you have an old friend who is now faced with death, it is also a difficult time for you. When I went to see a high school classmate of mine, Doug, a month before he passed away, I took our high school yearbook and it appeared to make him happy to see in photos all those people who used to be friends, that are hardly, if ever, seen these days. 

Perhaps bringing your yearbook and looking at the pictures will ease the tension that is sure to creep into the air at some point during your visit. Perhaps you can tell those hilarious stories and all have a good, great laugh!

In the end...it is between YOU AND GOD. 
I hope you are presently living in the Kingdom of God!

ASK, SEEK, KNOCK

Ask, and you will receive; seek, and you will find; knock, and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks will receive, and anyone who seeks will find, and the door will be opened to him who knocks.

Matthew 7: 7-8

 

HOW COMFORTING!

Happiness is the Lord

Happiness is the Lord

Song by Ira F. Stanphill

Happiness is to know the Savior, Living a life within His favor,

Having a change in my behavior, Happiness is the Lord.

Real joy is mine, no matter if teardrops start;

I've found the secret--it's Jesus in my heart!

Happiness is the Lord, Happiness is the Lord.

Today's Hymn

Jesus, I Come

Song by George C. Stebbins

 

Out of my bondage, sorrow and night,

Jesus, I come, Jesus I come;

Into Thy freedom, gladness and light,

Jesus I come to Thee.

 

Out of my sickness into Thy health,

Out of my want and into Thy wealth,

Out of my sin and into Thy-self,

Jesus I come to Thee.

Potter's Clay

I am not always right,
sometimes I am wrong,
and I'll even admit it.

I am not always happy,
sometimes I am sad,
but I try not to show it.

I am not always _____,
sometimes I am ______,
_____________________.

Go ahead...fill in the blanks.
No one is perfect...
...that's what's so special about us.

He is the potter,
We are the clay!

(ALLOW YOURSELF TO BE MOLDED)

Prayer Does Work

The first big snowstorm of the season is happening today. Not wanting to travel to and from work in bad weather with dangerous roads, I called and asked for the day off. They said yes.

I decided to bake cookie bars for the cookie swap coming up.

When the lights flickered three times and I still had 15 minutes to go on my cookie bars finishing in the oven, I prayed "Please Lord, just give me a few more minutes so these can finish." So the power stayed on (and I turned up the oven heat). I took the bars out one second and the power went off the next second.

Prayer does work!

Even for silly things!

How cool is that!

Beauty in the Sky

THIS IS WHAT I CALL AN AWE-INSPIRING SUNSET!

THE SKY IS AFIRE AS
GOD PAINTS HIS BEAUTY IN THE SKY.

ALL SENSES FADE AWAY
AND THE BEAUTY OF THE EARTH
IS ALL THAT MATTERS
AT THIS VERY AWE-INSPIRING MOMENT.

THIS MOMENT IN TIME
IS TAKEN ON THE CORNER
OF FOUR & FIRE STREET,
IN MY HOMETOWN IN NH.

THIS PICTURE EMBEDDED
IN MY WEB PHOTO ALBUM,
IN THE ELECTRIC SKY,
AND IN MY MEMORY...

FOR MY MIND TO ALWAYS SEE.


(Photo by Nella Masil)